home
home? i suppose it is. although i don’t feel like i belong here anymore. or ever did (which i now realise). By home i don’t mean my house, nor this town, more this country, this way of life.
It’s not that it’s too dull, although it can be. It’s not that it’s too small, it’s definately not. It’s just too comfortable, too routine. Being in Europe taught me a lot. Life shouldn’t be about settling down, working your way up the corporate ladder, not for me anyway. I want to experience everything, go everywhere, do everything. Explore.
Gah. This week has been hell. The day i got back it begun. Wake up. Breakfast. Take mum to work. Sit at the beach for 2 hours. Come home. Check emails. Read. Watch tv. Walk the dog. Drive into town, drive home again immediately. Have lunch. Nap. Pick mum up. Have dinner. Watch tv. Go to bed. Watch tv on dvd until morning. Sleep for 1 or 2 hours. Do it all again.
I miss doing something different everyday. Waking up in a strange city and exploring.
But alas. I return to work tomorrow. Pay off my debts. Get money to live off, by live i mean buy alcohol and cigarettes. Settle back into routine :’(
I feel the need to turn to hard drugs.
